Original story:
Great Drives
Going Somewhere Quickly
Germany still hasn’t got speed limits on some stretches of autobahn, but the traffic is so dense that you can’t enjoy this freedom. And off-road is strictly off-limits. Enough reasons to emigrate to SA. But what is a Porsche Cayenne doing in Cape Town, when homesickness kicks in nonetheless? Well, he takes his chauffeur for a quick spin to Namibia for some black forest cake.
Words Dieter Losskarn
Images Elke Losskarn
While the Cayenne is thundering across the dirt road, somewhere between Karasburg and Ai-Ais Kudu FM is playing Queen’s „Another one bites the dust“. It obviously refers to all the guys I have overtaken so far. And Freddie goes on: „Are you ready, hey, are you ready for this.“ Yes, I surely am.
While with a Nissan Patrol or Land Rover Defender dust creeps in through even the tiniest crevices, powdering dashboard and seats, the Porsche seems to be completely sealed from the elements. „Are you hangin' on the edge of your seat.“
There are two worlds, the leather-smelling, air-conditioned lounge suite interior with Bose surround sound and the hot and dusty Discovery Channel live outside world. It feels like a drive-out cinema.
In the beginning, I must admit, taking it off the tar felt a bit like drinking Veuve Cliquot out of plastic cups, playing rugby in Gucci shoes on a muddy field or fiddling Cajun country songs on a Stradivari. But after a while you tend to forget about the 1-Million-Rand plus beneath your buttocks.
Distances shrink in direkt proportion to the engine output of your wheels. With the S model’s 340 hp they shrink noticably, which turns the usually long and exhausting drive from the Mother City to Nam into a fun ride. Going somewhere quickly.
Enough reason to take a slight detour off the N 7. From Clanwilliam via Calvinia to Brandvlei. Famous Verneuk Pan, a huge, almost flat clay surface lies close by. About 100 kilometers close by. Real men don’t ask for directions, which is why a guy invented global positioning, but I wasn’t familiar with the on-board GPS navigation in the Porsche as yet, and I was running low on gas, so I pulled up to the Brandvlei hotel. The manager is obviously used to giving directions, as nowadays Verneuk Pan is an extremely popular location for car manufacturers and film makers. Remember the BMW M 5 land speed record commercial? Shot there as well.
In 1929 the vast plain saw British Bluebird pilot Sir Malcolm Campbell try to break the world land speed record. The task facing the people preparing the track was an enormous one. The pan was, as mentioned before, a long way from anywhere and the „roads“ were bumpy and exhausting. On and near the pan puffadders and scorpions were thriving in a region where temperatures can easily rise to 45°C in the non-existing shade. Dust devils chased over the flat surface and mirages tricked onlookers on a regular basis. Worst of all, scalpelsharp stones, fatal to tyres at high speed, covered the area.
The day for "the flash in the pan" had to be postponed several times. The delays concerned Campbell a lot. When he came to South Africa 331 km/h was the target he had to beat. But every day he expected bad news from Daytona, USA. And they arrived. On March 11th, his speed freak competitor Henry Segrave had pushed the land speed record to 370 km/h in his Golden Arrow.
Finally, on Sunday April 21, Campbell decided to go for it. His mean speed for the measured mile was just slightly under 350 km/h. He had beaten the speed he had meant to beat, when he came to South Africa, but he was six weeks too late.
Today the Campbell track on Verneuk Pan is marked with a sign. In order to appreciate what Campbell did almost 80 years ago, drive the 16-mile-track in your own car. At first thought this sounds like a speed deprived city slicker’s wet dream.
To my own shame, I have to admit that I didn’t dare going past the 200 km/h threshold. Even with ABS and all kinds of computer-regulated stability programmes the ghostly phantom mirage images all around me in this white, otherworldly and horizonless nothingness and the wobbly feeling in my buttocks made me slow down rather quickly. I take my hat off Mr Campbell.
Back to Nam. The first rest stop is in sight. And the timing is just right. The last rays of the fading sun are hitting the massive red rock boulders and the quiver trees in between, bathing them in a fairytale light. Behind the Cayenne whirls a huge golden cloud of fairy dust.
Built around an old German farm the Canyon Lodge’s cosy natural stone cottages are hidden among those rocks, using parts of them as inside walls. And car nuts will go crazy about the decorative items in and around the place. Al fresco automobilia seems to be cluttered around, but is in fact strategically placed. Ranging from historic truck wrecks to old tools, dented gasoline cans to vintage signage, especially the very sought-after dark-blue enamel piece with the famous „Sperrgebiet“ warning.
But what Belgian owner Alain offers me on arrival is even more appreciated: an ice-cold Hansa draught beer. The oral pleasure of enjoying this heavenly refreshment is unexpectedly interrupted by one of Alain’s workers. Casually he asks his boss, whether they should fix the flat on this white Porsche. Flat???
Indeed, the right rear wheel is airless. The intruder, a rusty nail, is quickly found and the hole plugged. But right next to it is an even more worrisome sight: a chunk of tread is missing and the canvas is peeping through. Surprisingly, despite the damage the repaired tyre is holding the air.
Luckily on the eve of departing from Cape Town I had a bad feeling about the flimsy emergency wheel and electrical tyre pump (which later turned out to be utterly useless) in the back of the Porsche and opted for a complete ersatz wheel, which, after I picked it up at the extremely well-organised Porsche Centre in Durbanville (one of only two in the country), took over more than half of the already limited luggage space. So for serious Cayenne travellers the optional spare wheel holder is a must-have.
A couple of phone calls later, interrupted by power failures, it was clear that a 255/55 R 18 Conti 4x4 Sport Contact was currently not available in Southern Africa, but a tyre shop in Windhoek had a couple of Conti Contacts in stock. Right size, but without the „Sport“, meaning the Cayenne would be restricted to a Vmax of 200 km/h instead of 270 km/h with the „R“ rating. Well, that was actually fine.
Back on tar and up north to Windhoek, with returning confidence.
The car moves effortlessly, 200 km/h feels more like 100 km/h. Compared to an overseas flight, the Cayenne would be the first-class option, the „poor man’s Cayenne“, VW’s Touareg would be business, a Pajero economy and a Nissan double-cab would be flying the distance in a light aircraft with one engine. Believe me, I know what I am talking about, having had the dubious pleasure of riding the same route in one of the latter ones recently - a truly back-breaking experience.
At a traveling speed of around 190 km/h, the Porsche as well as its driver are becoming rather thirsty in the generally dry Namibian environment. The 4.5 litre-V 8 enjoys about 20 litres of lead-free per 100 kilometers. With great foresight the Cayenne developers fitted a 100 litre tank. Even in speedy mood, you’ve got a range of around 500 kms, which is fine for those parts of Southern Africa a Cayenne is likely to go to in its predominantly urban live.
With an almost empty tank, having it filled up is always an interesting experience. After the first 50 liters the attendants are still fairly relaxed, 20 more and he/she is getting nervous, frequently looking back and forth between pump and nozzle. Most of them can’t bear more than 90 litres, before they stop the flow to check the underbelly of the car for any leakages.
The Windhoek stopover is in actual fact outside Namibia’s capital city. Further out than anticipated. After dozens of kilometres of narrow, dusty farm roads, with several farm gates, as a chance of getting out and enjoying the significantly higher outside temperatures. Finally, just before the feeling of being lost sinks in, a little wooden sign. One more slope and here it is, a castle in the middle of nowhere. Built by visionaries. Gloria and Hans truly fulfilled their dream of a farm in Africa, which numerous happy visitors have confirmed in the guest book. The candle light dinners are superb, the four rooms stylishly and elegantly furnished. The 360 degree views over the mountains are going on forever and are best enjoyed from inside the overflow pool.
The next morning, with special permission from the neighbouring farm, the Cayenne takes a shortcut towards the west, which ends after dozens of beautiful mountain tracks right at the B 1, about 25 kilometres north of Windhoek.
The next stop lies just across Namibia’s main highway. Düsternbrook, the oldest guest house in the country, is reached after another dusty stretch. It offers rustic farm accomodation and the chance of seeing Cesar in action. Cesar is the local leopard and very much used to jumping into a photogenic old tree to collect his reward, which consists of a couple of meat chunks, strategically placed there beforehand.
Between Windhoek and the above-mentioned black-forest cake in Swakopmund lies another stunning dirt road, some mountains and the Namib desert. If you want genuine German cake fare, Café Anton is the place to go. The black waitress takes the order in perfect German. The ambience is depressingly conservative, but the black-forest cake is worth the drive and the coffee is so strong, that the Cayenne pilot’s pump is running on high rpm.
Enough caffeine to reach the next stop, which lies, typical for Namibia, once again in the middle of nowhere: Solitaire. It reminds visitors of one of those Australian outback pubs. The coffee and the always freshly baked apple crumble are must-haves. And the tank should be filled up.
The Namib Desert Lodge offers some great sandy and rocky farm roads, next to some unique petrified sand dunes. Time to see whether the Cayenne is any good off the beaten track, or whether it is just a demonstration of personal wealth. Even without the advanced off road package, which consists of an additional rear diff lock and hydraulically disengageable anti-roll bars at the front and rears, the car performs astonishingly well. A very big plus is the air suspension, especially in softer sand. The best way to conquer the bigger sand dunes is actually to switch the anti-slip control off, engage 2nd low gear plus diff lock and roar upwards.
One of Namibia’s biggest attractions are now very close by, the mighty red Sossusvlei sand dunes. Several beautiful lodges cater for exhausted travellers. On of them is Le Mirage, which at first sight looks like a Moroccan king’s palace. The name could not have been chosen any better. Arriving at the Mirage feels like experiencing one. Service and ambience immediately push it to number one in my personal hit list of places to crash in Namibia.
The rooms are spacious with high ceilings, airy and earthen. The shower area is big enough to hold two comfortably, or four close friends.
And I’ve already heard lots about their wellness centre. Time to see what it is all about. I change into my personal fluffy-white bathrobe and approach the treatment rooms. Their ambience is also soothingly oriental. I sit down in a comfortable chair at a low heavy teak table.
An exquisitely beautiful young coloured woman, obviously of Nama origin is walking around, and I watch her moving around as if she is floating on air.
She is floating towards me, handing me a glass of cold water with a slice of lemon, we smile at each other, I tell her I am here for the full body massage and away she is floating. Well, I must admit this is not my first wellness pampering experience and what usually happens at this stage is, that the one that floats away is being instantly replaced by an old crone wearing bedroom slippers. God, I think, sometimes plays cruel jokes on married men. But thank God not this time. The slender, impala-like creature with the choreographed moves of a praying mantis floats back and invites me into one of the treatment rooms.
What follows is an hour of bliss, which one should experience and not read about. All I can tell you is, that it relaxes you completely, while your mind is drifting away to fantastic dreamlands, where everything is possible, a fantasy world where you are drinking champagne out of fountains and your car title bears the words Porsche Cayenne.
The five-course dinner in the evening is outstanding as well, especially when you take into consideration how remote this place actually is. Skillfully prepared and beautifully presented cuisine. Full marks in every regard for Le Mirage.
Further south there is the area, where Namibia’s diamond rush once took place. Diamonds are still being found, but no longer by private adventure seekers. Still, memories of those wild times are invariably rekindled by the sight of a car wreck of 1930s vintage rusting away in the Geisterschlucht, the aptly named ghost canyon. A gangster vehicle? There are a number of bullet holes in it, after all, which add to the mysterious aura of the derelict. Reportedly the rattly Hudson Terraplane was used as a getaway car by diamond smugglers. The truth is slightly less romatic. The car had breathed out its life on a rather normal Sunday picnic tour and was torched by its rather choleric German owner for giving up on him. Hunters later used the wreck for target shooting.
The Hudson shell is by far not the only highlight during the last stop in Namibia, on the guest farm Klein-Aus Vista. Owner Piet can offer a fantastic 4x4 day trip into the Koichab dunes area or a shorter one to watch the wild horses of the Namib. The natural stone cottages of Eagles Nest are similiar to the ones at the Canyon Lodge, built in between the mighty rocks.
After a first-class „flight“ back to Cape Town, one of the hardest things I had to do in a long time was giving back the key with the little jumping horse emblem. Back to your stable my friend. I sincerely hope we’ll meet again. Until then I’ll keep the keyring with the tiny silver Cayenne.
The car:
If you want to dream on, Porsche South Africa has a wonderful website with everything you need to know about the Cayenne (including used car prizes, several movies and all kinds of equipment) as well as the other dream machines – out of Germany: www.porsche.co.za.
Cayenne prices start at R 855 000, the featured S will cost you R 895 000 in its basic version and the top-class Turbo will set you back R 1 475 000.
Porsche Cayenne S specifications:
4.5 litre naturally aspirated V8 engine
250 kW (340 hp)
420 Nm of torque from 2500 to 5500 rpm
Top speed 242 km/h
0-100 km/h 6.8 sec
Where to stay in Namibia:
Canyon Lodge, www.gondwanapark.com
Burg Gusinde, www.safaricorp.com
Düsternbrook, www.duesternbrook.net
Namib Desert Lodge, www.gondwana-desert-collection.com
Sossusvlei Mountain Lodge, www.ccafrica.com
Klein-Aus Vista, www.namibhorses.com
GQ Cars strongly recommends:
Le Mirage, www.lemiragelodge.com, do yourself a favour and indulge in a wellness treatment
Activities:
Namib Desert Ballooning with champagne breakfast in the desert, Namib Sky Adventure Safaris, www.balloon-safaris.com